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另一種壓力 by iChan

最近收看香港電台製作的『壓力不倒翁』,內容講及父母與子女之間的壓力, 筆者看後感到心有戚戚焉。幸而未真正經歷小囡要求跳樓的情況,這節目反而教我停一停,諗一諗。

一方面,考試本身已構成壓力。而另一方面父、母之間對子女期望有差別,久而久之造成磨擦,最終亦會構成子女的壓力。擧例,若果父母一方非常緊張子女的成績表現,又未能掌握教導功課的溝通技巧,時間緊拙下表現急躁。考試期間矛盾更甚,所謂無名火好易起,狂飲涼茶都無效!

若夫婦間期望另一方能全權負責教導功課,並要達到預期超高目標,這樣,就會令負責温習的一方構成無形壓力,特別當收到成績表未能達標的時候,真是「拿住report,心慌慌」,一方面要安慰子女,但另一方要即時想出「绝招」拆情緒大炸彈,耗費驚人能量,累透!

未知香港電台這系列製作,會否就此情況多拍一輯以夫婦期望有别令子女承受更大壓力再添一部『壓力不倒翁』呢?

有關節目請瀏覧以下網址:
http://programme.rthk.hk/rthk/tv/programme.php?name=t

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Drawn by Irene

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花樣美好名校夢 by iChan

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香港升中派位結果快將公報,到時可能在各大報章或電視新聞,將看到家長和學生因達成志願的喜悅,或為未如理想的失望。作為家長的我當然理解那些感受。莫說升中 ,升小學甚至幼兒園 ,又或者升大學,作為家長都是期望子女能入讀一所比較好的學校,甚至名校 。看到很多達成期望的都咧嘴而笑,我不禁問有否想過到底父母心儀的名校是否適合子女的需要呢 ?

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Take the Burden with our Children

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Source: 1,000,000 pictures

Yesterday, a boy came to me sharing a series of unpleasant things he noticed on the media. To name a few, beating up new classmates, harrassing females, coercing peers to give money, unlawful video recording female passengers, cyber bullying, suicide of the bullied, rape and the like. My heart is broken! Loads of selfishness, violations of respect and care, using people as object for sexual interests, deliberate victimization are attacking young people. Those who have a big heart suffer, especially our sensitive and compassionate children.

As caregivers, parents and professional helpers, we should recognize these loads of moral burden with the young people. We have to listen to their feelings, experience and sadness. At the same time, we need to tell them our beliefs and reassure them of our faith in the goodness of people, despite of witnessing all the bad things in the society. One of the most important messages is the victory of righteousness.

Honestly, people do bad things which have caused damages to different gender, social classes, minority people, tribes, races, nations and wildlife habitats throughout human history. Yet, we are not afraid of standing up and countering back to restore peace. Regardless of evil plans of some people in our history, human species have never ever been destroyed. Why? It is evident that throughout history, people has been successful to maintain peace and prosperous growth, protect the young, old, weak and poor, avoid chances of termination of species , including mankind.

So in brief, we should make it clear to our children that only the desire and efforts of peace can save us from being destroyed. Peace making is our future. And future is in our hands.

As guardians of our young people, we practise peace making behaviors. In our families, we are serious about making peace with all family members, it may not be easy though. By urging every member involved to consider what to do and think of promoting peace, we are practising peace.

World peace is nothing abstract. Let’s start working on it every single day with people we love and also with those we dislike or even hate. May peace be always with us. As our children grow older, they practise the act of peace making and the rule of loving people in places they go and with whom they meet.